Step to the Edge
by fanged.vampire.genius
Summary: “I love you” I love you too, forever, but that’s the thing that separates us, you didn’t grant me eternity with youMaybe soon, I’ll see you again, heaven I presume. Now let me fall.Dare you to catch me. BxE R&R! Suprises in store in this story!
1. Prologue: Steps

**Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters and music that will be viewed here. The Twilight characters is owned by Stephenie Meyer. And the Music is from bands/singers/etc. **

**But this poem is owned by me!!!!!!! no one steals it!**

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**Step to the Edge**

It is the day where I go out in the cliffs. No one can stop me from flying free, maybe except you

Roll of the thunder, clasp of the lightning everything is so lively

I hear your voice again

"Stop," you said, and I know I promised you nothing reckless

But you broke promises too, my love, you left me.

As I approach the edge so inviting, I smiled. I reminisce about the past

Hearing and seeing you once more

The tears started to drop like the rain falling from the dark clouds

The waves are crashing, I hear its yearning

"Don't do it please," I heard you whisper, I took it for granted

For this is the last time I can have you again, through your voice

So it will end up like Romeo and Juliet, just like the play

Here I am at the edge about to seek my end

"I love you"

I love you too, forever, but that's the thing that separates us, you didn't grant me eternity with you

Maybe soon, I'll see you again, heaven I presume.

Now let me fall.

Dare you to catch me.

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**Author's Note: Do you guys like the Prolouge? I do! Tell me if you guys like it. Reviews are appreciated.! Don't worry. The next chapters are gonna be posted soon, if I'm not busy with school. **


	2. Falling Away in the Sun

**Author's Note: Here we go.. Things are going to be a little bit interesting in here. Don't hate me because of Jacob.. haha. Sorry, but I do not own the amazing characters that you would see in this story(they are by Stephenie Meyer). Maybe only some.. The songs that you would see aren't mine also. **

**I WOULD RECOMMEND IF YOU DOWNLOAD THE SONGS THAT YOU ARE ABOUT TO WITNESS!!! I really think that if you listen to them you are gonna be like "OMG! totally the POV of the character" or something along those lines. I am going to try to have songs, poems etc.. inside every POV and chapter.. **

**Here are the songs that are going to be in the Chapter. **

**Falling Away by Miguel Escueta and In the Sun by Jospheph Arthur. Your reading experience would be so much better if you hear these songs! **

**Thank you Christina(if you don't know who she is she is my editor and co-writer and Best Friend!)**

**ENJOY!**

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_**Chapter 1: Falling Away in the Sun**_

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**Jacob's POV**

_**Here we go, it's crashing down around  
Through the speed as we try to define  
Doubts re-surface, waves you can't withstand  
We find ourselves here once again  
And we're**_**…**

_**We're falling away  
We're falling away  
We're falling away from this…**_

It has been hell for me for the past few months; I can't seem to replace _him_. Every time I look at Bella, all is see is a corpse, a soulless body. Am I not enough? I try and I try… But it just wouldn't seem to work. No matter, I am not going to give up.

Edward doesn't deserve her. Heck, I don't even deserve her, but sometimes think that I am better than that _bloodsucker_. At least I am not the one that left her at this state.

It's good to see Bella getting better. And I'm glad because I am the cause of it. I'm making progress at least she's smiling now, and becoming approachable. God, it makes my heart beat furiously just to see that smile of ---.

"Ahhh!" No! It can't be… I told her. Shit! Bella, no, no NO! We agreed that we are going to cliff diving when I AM THERE!

I ran as quickly as possible. I know she's at the cliffs. The thunder and the winds are picking up. I can smell her. There's a storm out there, I can't believe she would do this. _Don't die Bella, Please don't die_ is all I can think of before coming after her.

_**Wasn't it enough to let you feel the sun?  
Am I not worth every fall?  
We've gone too deep to just let this fly  
So please hold on and let me save us  
Please hold on and let me save us**_

I jumped off the cliff. I immediately sought her in the violent waves. Swimming as fast as I could, I then grabbed her, and stoke to shore.

I put my head against her rising chest. I can hear her heart beating slowly. _Breathe, Bella, Breathe. Wake up please…_I wished silently.

Her tempo is slowing down. I need to save her before --- Don't think about that Jacob. I suddenly thought. I looked at her slightly parted lips; I began to wonder if that leech even realized what he was leaving behind. Then I looked at her closed eyes. Why is she feeling all of this anguish? I can see the wounds that _he_ left behind. If only there's away to hold her together…

I slowly approached her, it's this or she dies. As I closed the proximity between our lips, I enjoyed the feeling because maybe this is the only chance I get to kiss her. I breathe into her, lingering for a bit. I don't want to disappoint her by deepening the kiss; it's not the right time. _Breathe Bella. _

_**How long must I weather this storm?  
I'm drowning into your condescending eyes  
Please bend for me, even just a bit  
Can't you see that I am already broken**_

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**_Oh… can't you feel it? _**

**_We are falling into the abyss that we just can't comprehend _**

**_Oh… don't you know that some wounds just never heal._**

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**Bella's POV**

_**I picture you in the sun wondering what went wrong  
And falling down on your knees asking for sympathy  
And being caught in between all you wish for and all you seen  
And trying to find anything you can feel that you can believe in**_

The beam of the sun awoke me, as I thought I was going to the dark or maybe my paradise, I felt my eyes open. The salt-ness of the waters is causing my throat to ache. I coughed. I tried to sit up but someone was holding me down.

"Bella stay down, or you'll be hurt."

I remember that voice… Jacob! Everything started coming back to me. The hurt, the pain, and the suffering, my heart broke into pieces again. I also thought about the cliffs, the dive, and nothing more. I struggled for a second time to get up, I want to see Jacob, my life saver, because I don't want to see _him_, hiding behind my eyelids.

"Bella, stop, I am going to carry you back to my place, I'm sure Charlie is worried."

I didn't persist anymore; for once I heard that voice I knew that I was safe. I sensed Jacob carrying me, carefully handling me like I was a fragile vase. I snuggled into his warmth, and let the haunting face come to me once again.

I heard mumbling around me. I can decipher some voices, Charlie, Billy and Jacob, I'm not familiar with the rest.

"Is she suicidal!?!"

"It's all _his_ fault! I cannot bear to say _his_ name anymore!"

"What was she thinking? To jump of that cliff in this weather is she crazy?"

"At least she's alive, I never thought a girl like her would do that though."

Since I don't want to hear anymore of their talks, I managed to get up. I let my eyes wander, and decided to let is reside towards the group in front of me. After a few seconds, they managed to notice me awake. And guess who suddenly appeared to my side…

"Bella! Jesus, I can't even leave you alone for a few hours and you already—"

"Jacob, can you please not remind me on what happened?" I quickly stopped him from saying. "Thank you though," I told him. And then I saw him smile widely at me, I couldn't resist curving the sides of my mouth to curve up, despite of the life threatening things I just did.

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**_I dont know anymore  
What it's for  
I'm not even sure  
If there is anyone who is in the sun  
Will you help me to understand  
Cause I been caught in between all I wish for and all I need  
Maybe you're not even sure what its for  
Any more than me_**

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_**End of Chapter.**_

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**Author's Note: Don't worry it's not a Jacob and Bella story.. Now, REVIEW please, because it keeps my motivation in writing going.. and I want to know what you all felt. You all need to be ready for Chapter Two. I'm in the process of writing it. It's going to be posted soon. !!! Thanks for reading! REVIEW!!! Things are going to be a little bit interesting in the next chapters.**

**fanged.vampire.genius or Jea**


	3. Never Alone in Learning the Art

**Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters you're about to read! They all belong to stephenie meyer.**

**Hey everyone! Well here is my Chapter 2! Hopefully it's still as good. haha. It's going to take me awhile to do Chapter 3 since my Mid Terms are next week! ahh!!! But of course here's the songs that I have here in the chapter.. **

**Never Alone by Barlow Girl! (thanks xtina for getting me hooked!)**

**Learning the Art of Letting Go by Mikaila**

**Thanks for the reviews!!! I wouldn't have done this Chapter without the help of my bestfriend Christina! All of my work is approved by her first! haha. Thanks xtina!**

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_Chapter 2: Never Alone in Learning the Art_

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**Bella's POV**

_**I waited for you today  
But, you didn't show  
No no no  
I needed You today  
So where did You go?  
You told me to call  
Said You'd be there  
And though I haven't seen You  
Are You still there?**_

All of the events had haunted me in my sleep. I can't take it anymore. Through the midst of the forgotten love that _he _seemed to always make me remember, I see a sort of escape. This all seemed to happened after I attempted my infamous fall.

I shattered my train of thought and went to the shower. I needed to wash away Jacob's warm touch. I craved the feeling of the coldness of the water which seems to remind me so much of _his_ touch.

After a while I went out of the shower, dried off, and changed into my plain self. I wanted to hear his voice again, just like what he did to me in the cliffs. But sometimes his velvet tone is just unbearable. It kills me to keep on hoping, wanting, waiting…for _him_ to come back. Sometimes I welcome the nightmares, because it is the only time I get to hear him, sense him, and have him, even if it meant my heart breaking all over again.

On the other hand, I feel emptiness inside when Jacob is not physically here. I can always count on him for me to distract myself. But when Jacob leaves, _he _again always seems to cross my mind, and making me feel guilty along the way. I want to be pure again. I longed for a new start.

I tumbled down the stairs, yet again, expecting for_ him_ to catch me. But of course my wish had not come true _once more_. Here I am on my knees with the wooden floor as my companion and my tears as my acquaintance.

"Bella are you alright?" I heard Charlie query from the kitchen. I wiped off my tears and quickly replied, "Yes," though I wasn't sure if I was questioning myself or answering him.

When I thought I recovered from my sad state, I seemed to only put on my usual emotionless mask instead. I trudged to the kitchen, feeling as if the floor turned into quicksand, slowing down my every move.

"Hey Dad, are you going to the station today?"

"Yea, the guys down there said that they needed me today."

"Oh… Okay," was all I could reply.

"Bella, what happened yesterday? I mean---"

"Dad please don't---"

"No. I need to tell you this now. I don't know what the hell were you thinking and I don't want to find out, but just remember that Jacob_ saved_ you. And you are lucky enough to be standing here right now, breathing, because of him. I've seen the way he looks at you Bella. And it resembles that Edwa---"

I winced in pain as my mind shot to an image of perfection, of grace, a stranger that was slowly becoming a clearer portrait that half of me wanted to let it subside, but the other told me to let it become more lucid.

"---Sorry, that _guy_ a bit. Meaning to say he really cares about you. And don't tell me that I didn't see you smiling back at him. Just… what I am trying to say is, be happy with Jacob, and let that _bastard_ go."

Then Charlie left with a satisfied smile in his face. I hung my head down. That really struck a chord. Should I really let go and pay back? I love _him_ so much, but does that mean I have to inquire feelings that I gave to _him_, and _he_ gave to me to disappear? Saying that 'that guy' didn't lov--, but I know that it's for my own safety. Is leaving me behind practically dead, _his_ goal? What was the real purpose on _his_ departure? Does this pay have a tax of pain to endure? Is that price happiness with Jacob? Does Charlie really want me to go to Jacob and be happy? Is that even a possibility? Should I really... Would I… well… this will… yes… no… I need to..

Silent tears rolled down my cheeks again..

_**I cried out with no reply  
And I can't feel You by my side  
So I'll hold tight to what I know  
You're here and I'm never alone **_

We cannot separate  
'Cause You're part of me  
And though You're invisible  
I'll trust the unseen..

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_**Now here it comes, the hardest part of all **_

_**Unchain my heart that's holding on **_

_**How do I start to live my life alone? **_

_**Guess I'm just learning, **_

_**Learning the art of letting go**_

The gift of Sundays, a time to do whatever we need to do. People spend their Sundays to play, to relax, to study, to catch on sleep or maybe to spend time with their friends and family. But for me, this Sunday is the day that I will learn to let _him_ go.

Thoughts are coming and rushing in my mind. I want to know how I'm going to do this sinful act. I need to learn how I am going to bury these feelings, but not really forgetting it. For I know that once I forget, I might regret it, and be nothing. It's the feelings that keep us or me alive.

Maybe I'll start it with a letter to him… right? So I went upstairs got a stationary set, my hands shaking in the process. I sat down in the table; I began to start my letter…

_Beloved Edward, _

_Just the thought of your name makes my heart ache, like a knife is stabbed through my heart. It creates a deeper gash, every single time. Is this really what you want for me? You thought that everything was going to be better when you left, would be as if you never existed. But those promises were never kept, because you still haunt me. _

_Plain, ordinary, clumsy and human; I understand why you left. But in the back of my mind, I still don't get how you would let me go through this pain? Despite that, why did you make me believe that you had loved me even when I am not as graceful and beautiful as a vampire?_

_You saved me numerous times. Tyler's truck, your nature, James, and even from myself. I am so sick and tired of me being so weak and pathetic; however I can't seem to let you go. Don't worry I am not mad at you; even if I tried, I can't seem to bring myself to believe such a lie. I'm not sure if it's even feasible to possibly have one ounce of hate, let only dislike for you._

_My world is falling apart because of your recollections. I try to hold on to the only string that needs to be cut, just in case that you might come back. Nevertheless I know the string will eventually wear out and break just as my heart did._

_Maybe to you I am just a tool to be able to pull human emotions that you once had. Well you were my tool for survival, that's why I am trying everything for you stay. Is it all a lie? Every time you say good night, or sing my lullaby is it just…_

_I know you didn't want my soul to be affected in anyway by you, but you were mistaken. You have created, perfected and damaged it in the best way possible. For I have learned to love and like they say, it's better to have loved and lost then never to have loved at all. _

_Regardless of all the past memories I had, it all leads back to you. Leaving me with a true and solid fact that I will never forget your presence, your touch, your topaz eyes that pierce through me, and your crooked smile that always seems to dazzle..._

_Between all the lines and the letters of my emotions, I'll simply state it in this manner. _

_I do and will always love you far longer than forever…_

_With my whole being, _

_Bella_

By the time I ended the letter, a river of tears were running down my face. I needed to do this.

I grabbed my keys and headed out the door. I opened my truck and started it, bursting it alive. I came to a realization that I couldn't feel anything anymore. As if writing the letter had caused me to let my feelings go away too. I felt numb. I carelessly went to the meadow with absolutely no feelings in the ride, but each step towards it, results to a new feeling; getting my feelings back you could say. Then, I stepped in the middle of the meadow, gasping as I remembered the beauty it bestows.

"_So the lion fell in love with the lamb…"_

"_What a stupid lamb."_

"_What a sick masochistic lion."_

_**Watching us fade **_

_**What can I do? **_

_**But try to make it through **_

_**The pain of one more day **_

_**Without you **_

_**Where do I start, to live my life alone? **_

_**I guess I'm learning, only learning, **_

_**Learning the art of letting go. **_

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End of Chapter 2.

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**So.. What did you guys think? I know the letter is sad.. well. I'm still starting Chapter 3! Review! And it would be great if you suggested ideas!!! Thanks! Ohh yeah.. like i said earlier.. Chapter 3 is still in its beggining process.. So yeah.. I'll be a bit busy with my school and all.. I'll try to update soon! Thanks again! Review please!**


	4. Remember All The Rain

**Disclaimer: **

**Unfortunately I do not own the Twilight characters over here. [ But sorry if I haven't updated in a while, me and my editor are very busy for the past week! Midterms are over YAY! So the songs you are about to see are: **

**Remember When it Rained by Josh Groban, It's All The Same by the Sick Puppies, and Through the Rain by Mariah Carey. **

**Things are not moving still in this chapter, but they are soon, I just like to build up the story first! So don't get mad at me. Okay, so read and Review!

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**Chapter 3: Remember All the Rain

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_**Bella POV**_

_**Wash away the thoughts inside**_

_**That keep my mind away from you.**_

_**No more love and no more pride**_

_**And thoughts are all I have to do.**_

I felt my knees buckle, I couldn't take it anymore. I broke down and cried… it seemed that the whole world was crashing under me… I just cried until no more tears fell out of my eyes… I dug the forest floor with my hands, deeper and deeper I went. I punched, and went ballistic towards the dirt.

The raindrops started to fall from the sky, just like the tears that I am shedding. I looked up at it, feeling the water caress my cheeks… I placed the letter and my soul in the hole. Then I slowly covered it back within the muddy dirt.

_**Ohhhhhh Remember when it rained.**_

_**Felt the ground and looked up high**_

_**And called your name.**_

_**Ohhhhhh Remember when it rained.**_

_**In the darkness I remain.**_

"EDWARD!!!" I screamed, again and again, waiting for him to come back and make everything alright. This might be the last time I will ever say his name. The rain reminds me of happiness, because during school days, I know that he will be able to come, and light up my day… But now the rain will remind me of agony…

_**Tears of hope run down my skin.**_

_**Tears for you that will not dry.**_

_**They magnify the one within**_

_**And let the outside slowly die.**_

If I could have a wish, I would wish for the tears fall from my drenched eyes wouldn't come off, because it will be the proof that I did cry for the one I would only and fully love. I cannot describe the feeling I felt, it was unbearable, maybe dying would be better than heart ache. I slowly got up from the ground, and swore to never come back until…

"I love you Edward," I whispered and I kissed the soil where I had laid my letter. The letter that no one will ever know or find. I trudged back to the trail, feeling as if bright topaz eyes were watching my every move and breath, but I knew it was just my mind playing tricks on me again.

_**Remember when it rained.**_

_**In the water I remain**_

_**Running down**_

_**Running down**_

_**Running down

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**Jacob's POV**

_**I don't mind where you come from**_

_**As long as you come to me**_

_**I don't like illusions I can't see**_

_**Them clearly**_

_**I don't care no I wouldn't dare**_

_**To fix the twist in you**_

_**You've shown me eventually**_

_**What you'll do**_

One of the perks of becoming a werewolf is the sensitive hearing. I took notice of the familiar loud rumbling of a Chevy truck, meaning Bella is here. But why would she come right now without calling?

I opened the door and headed towards her. She looks really disheveled and hurt. What happened to her, please tell me she didn't get hurt again.

"Bella!" I exclaimed and opened the driver's seat for her. As she got out she quickly grabbed my white shit and hugged me. I could feel her body shuddering from sobbing, and the dampness of my shirt from her tears. All I could do is carry her back to my house, and whisper soothing words to calm her down.

Once she settled down I asked, "Bella, what happened to you?"

"I am trying to let him go Jacob," was all that she said before breaking down again. I am so happy, hopeful and depressed at the same time for her. Maybe I'll get my chance now, but I don't know if she is willing enough, she's hopelessly in love with that bloodsucker for goodness sakes! But maybe she can let her guard down and let me in, and accept that I love her.

_**I don't mind...  
I don't care...  
As long as you're here **_

Go ahead tell me you'll leave again  
You'll just come back running  
Holding your scarred heart in hand  
It's all the same  
And I'll take you for who you are  
If you take me for everything  
Do it all over again  
It's all the same 

"Bella, I know it's hard but everything is going to be okay, I know it. Just trust me, I'll never leave you."

"Thanks Jake. I can always count on you and your werewolf self."

I felt a sudden _de ja vu_. I really don't mind that Bella keeps running back to me whenever she gets heart broken; it makes me feel like I have a place in her life. A _lifesaver_, you can say. And I'll give up everything just to make her happy; Edward didn't know what happiness he left behind.

_**Hours slide and days go by**_

_**Till you decide to come**_

_**And in between it always seems too long**_

_**All of a sudden**_

Holding her close, I feel like I am the one that's keeping her together. It's all the same, when something or some_one_ hurts her, I am always there. I hugged her more tightly hearing her sobs as the raindrops go down. _Drip. Drip. Drip._

_**And I have the skill, yeah I have the will**_

_**To breathe you in while I can**_

_**However long you stay**_

_**Is all that I am

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**BELLA's POV**

_**When you get caught in the rain **_

_**With nowhere to run**_

_**When you're distraught**_

_**And in pain without anyone**_

_**When we keep praying out**_

_**To be safe**_

_**But nobody comes**_

_**And you feel so far away**_

_**That you just can't find you way home**_

_**you can get there alone **_

_**it's okay**_

_Drip. Drip. Drip._

All the sounds around me seemed to intensify as the sounds boomed in my ear. Although Jacob's burning hot skin is making me sweat, I still felt ice cold inside. I shivered, and Jake held me tighter.

I can make it, no matter what. I will be strong, with Jake by my side. Holding me tight makes me stronger, because I know that someone cares and believes in me. That's the thing I needed most, belief. The confidence that assures me that I will go far, even though the past is holding me back.

Clumsiness, humanity, and Edward can't stop me from moving forward with my life. I will hold in what I believe is right and follow through, no more of my foolishness. I had let my love go, and it's time to move on. Like a board game, roll the dice, and see your next move. Never will I let life come and bite my neck.

_**And if you keep falling down**_

_**Don't you dare give in**_

_**You will arise safe and sound**_

_**So keep pressing on steadfastly**_

_**And you'll find what you need to prevail**_

I shall make it through this storm that's occurring inside me. Stars shall bright my nights, once again. But for now, I will let Jacob's sun replace my nights and awake me in the dark that holds me.

_**And when the wind blows**_

_**And shadows grow close**_

_**Don't be afraid**_

_**There's nothing you can't face**_

_**And should they tell you**_

_**You'll never pull through**_

_**Don't hesitate**_

I am ready with everything that I face. No vampire, werewolf or witch, whatever that's out there, can stop me from reaching my goal. But what is my goal?

_**I can make it through the rain  
I can stand up once again  
On my own and I know  
That I'm strong enough to mend  
And every time I feel afraid  
I hold tighter to my faith  
And I live one more day  
And I make it through the rain**_

To be happy.

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**End of Chapter

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**Author's Note: Please make my day and REVIEW! Thank you for all the support! I will really appreciate on what you guys think so far, and don't be afraid to comment me! I am also open on your opinions, criticisms, predictions, etc. I'm still beginning Chapter 4, so just wait and keep on reading! **

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	5. Of Mischief and Indulgence

**_Disclaimer: The characters that are familiar in the Twilight Series do not belong to me. But the plot or w.e. is mine. _**

**_Author's Note: Hey everyone. I know I haven't updated in awhile, but here it is. This is my longest chapter yet! So Sorry that I kept you all waiting. but here it is! _**

_**Thank you for the readers and my reviewers, and also to my editor Christina, though she did take a while! grin**_

**_No songs this time, just another poem I made. _**

**_Have fun!

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Chapter 4: Of Mischief and Indulgence_**

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**BELLA's POV**

_**You let go **_

_**And I remained waiting**_

_**You said you don't love me anymore**_

_**And I remained hoping**_

**OCTOBER**

This feels nice to have someone to lean on. It took me time to accept Jacob's offering to be my boyfriend. The realization of him being always there, waiting with open arms, warms my cold heart. I'm satisfied now; I learned that this is how it's supposed to be, how it _needs_ to be, and I have to make the most of it.

It was really sweet for Jacob to move to Forks High, he did that as soon as he heard that I had opened a window, state that it is not a door, for him. And I had locked the door to my past love, leaving the key inside, somewhere, in me.

I had grown accustomed to Jacob cooking me breakfast, he said I was too thin. The smell of pancakes, scrambled eggs and bacon filled the air, and I looked at the face of Jacob filled with happiness. If I can only transfix my face with that gleefulness, maybe I can be more open?

He laid the full plate of food on the table, "Good morning Bells! How was sleep?" he questioned, ever so lightly. "Mornin' Jake, it was alright. Of course I felt that someone was watching me, who could it be?"

"Hmm… I don't know, but I bet he was handsome, tall, and lean. Not to mention, has a pretty darn nice personality."

"Well can you tell him, if you know that stalker so well, to not look anymore, since I am taken by this guy named Jacob."

"No problem, ma'am. Wouldn't want that Jacob kid to be mad," and I laughed at our childish remark.

Jacob and I continued to eat the food that he had prepared. Well, okay most of it was him eating it, and I only had small portions of each.

When we finished eating, we grew to our routine of arguing on who does the dishes, but we always end up doing it together, he washes, I dry.

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_**Time passed and I moved on**_

_**But my heart remains broken**_

_**And when I am alone**_

_**Words of truth are spoken**_

We arrived at school today, and noticed that everyone was doing their normal morning duties, like talking to friends, doing some homework, and studying on their upcoming quizzes and tests.

Jacob quickly ran out of his car and opened the passenger door for me. When I got out, he pinned me against the truck. He slowly leaned in, and gently placed his lips against mine, as if I were a fragile glass beneath him, ready to be broken. He knew that he can't go as passionate as he wants too; I'm not _that _kind ofgirl, and he respects my decision. But we do kiss, the kind of kiss that is passionate, but not hungry. He lingered for a little longer, he feels so warm, unlike _his_ ki—I'm not suppose to think about that.

After a few seconds later, we ended our kissing session, with an end of him kissing me on the nose, staying there afterwards, staring at me, grinning like an idiot. And with not much force, I smiled back.

When I looked over his shoulder, everyone seemed to be staring at us, _again_, as if they had never seen couples kiss before. But then I noted the fact that my fellow school mates seemed to be staring at us with awe, jealousy and another feeling that I cannot comprehend.

"Jake, I think we should be going, everyone is highly amused by our display," I said blushing a bit.

"Well let them be, I just want to stay for a while looking at your chocolate brown eyes," he answered with a teasing voice. I suddenly pouted.

"Don't keep that face Bella, you know it might stay like that forever."

"Haha. But you know, you always like it when I pout, because I look like a cute innocent little puppy, that you just seem to can't get enough off."

"Touchè."

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_**I love him too with every breath I take**_

_**But at times I dreamt**_

_**That it is you I see when I wake**_

_**Its torment**_

The bell rang and Jake walked me down our hallways, since we get 10 minutes to arrive to class, and his building is right next door. As I was heading towards Mr. Smith's class, a feeling crept in my mind, an eerie feeling that something was bound to happen today, it made me anxious and excited, I guess?

When I got to the door, I leaned towards Jacob and gave him a peck on the cheek and said, "See you in an hour." Because I know that, no matter how I object, he likes to walk me to class.

As I glanced on the front board of the class, it reminded me of what day it was. I went to my seat, and sat down, rushing, because mischief Thank God Its Friday has arrived! And I was excited because it was a 4- day weekend this week since the mid-term exams were finally over and done with. In my mind, what the heck, let's just start the weekend early and skip later. A boost of confidence and mischievousness surged through me.

Mr. Smith interrupting my thoughts announced, "Class, you all have a free time today, please do not abuse this privilege that I am giving you. And keep your voices at a bare minimum".

As soon as everyone heard the word "free time", the class burst into happy whispers of approval. Of course the whispers wouldn't be soft later on, for it will gradually become louder like always.

The desks were shifted and rearranged, and some students, like me, got out their Mp3's and books, and some went quickly to their friends and chatted.

I was highly ecstatic, like the rest, I played the song "I'm Just a Kid" by Simple Plan and went about on reading _Harry Potter 7_. I never knew that this series could be so addicting, normally I indulge myself on old classics, like _Pride and Prejudice_, _Romeo and Juliet_ and my personal favorite, _Wuthering Heights_.

I was so focused on my reading that a mere tap didn't shake me from my strife. Not until someone practically shoved my shoulder did I notice someone else's unwelcome presence.

"What do you want!?!," I exclaimed, harsh enough so that the intruder would shudder at my voice. I couldn't believe that someone would disturb me especially when it was just getting good in _The Prince's Tale_. Sighs I should have known it would be…

"Hey Bella! I was wondering if you want to go out with me this weekend, since it's the break and all, plus I can take you out some---,"

"Sorry no, _not_ interested, as you can see Mike, I'm going out with Jacob, and I would be spending time with him all weekend."

"Oh." And that was all I got. Clearly, Jessica, his girlfriend, heard this and quickly slapped him right across his cheek. The echo was heard around the room, and all attention was on them.

"You son of a bitch!" a very angry Jessica started, "you know what? We are through!" Mike stood agape, but then darted out of the room with the humiliation following him. Students were giving Jessica high fives, and you-go-girl's! Apparently, before I was here and even after, Mike had a tendency to be a playboy over the years, I just never noticed it, or maybe never tried to.

In no way have I thought I'd see the day, but Jessica sat next to me and started making amends.

"I don't know why I went out with that guy," Jess said, "maybe I was just jealous of you and Edward, and now with Jacob, because you always seem to get the right guys too." I ignored the fact that she said his name, but the hole I once contained started seeping through again.

"Jess, I am so sorry, but I really don't know why, but you are a great girl as long as you keep your dramas to yourself, keep that mouth of yours shut, and contain the green monster," I courageously said.

She looked up at me, as if she just saw the light of the world.

"Bella, you are the first person that has ever told the honest truth. Thank you. Maybe this is the reason they all like, no, love you. Thanks again."

After that, we started talking about Harry Potter and listening to our Mp3's. But it was broken up, by a few guys asking her out on a date, and she seemed very happy and humble at the same time, remembering the advice I gave her on being vain. I felt the sides of my mouth curve up.

Everyone seemed to be in high hopes that other teachers would do the same, have free time, be carefree, and just hang out. Well I had different plans in mind. I would make my day off happen, well, I'll eventually come back before my last subject starts.

I was at the edge of my seat, waiting for the last minute hand to go and strike at the 12. 5, 4, 3, 2, 1…RING!

I jumped out, knowing that Jacob was waiting for me in my lockers.

I arrived at a record time of 35 seconds, counting also a few stops that I had made with the ground.

"Jacob, come on, skip the rest of the day with me. We'll be back before the last hour."

"Bella, today's not really the day… I have a bad feeling about this."

"Please! You're the one that wanted to skip a few times, why not this time?" I gave him my puppy dog face, eyes wide, lips pouted, and the mask that was on the verge of crying.

"Alright. Okay! Just stop, you know I am helpless with that look. Good thing the teachers aren't doing anything today."

"Yes! I love you! Thank you! Thank you!" I grabbed his hands and went straight to the parking lot, where Jacob's car awaited us.

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_**You will never disturb**_

_**Such a lie**_

_**For in my mind you lurk**_

_**Your memories made me die**_

I felt the light breezes of the wind around me. The smell of the nearby forests, and the salty ocean waters made me feel… so free.

Standing on the beach, feeling the sand between my toes, I remembered that Jacob saved me from the very same blackened sea that washes on the shores before me and this is where my new life began with him. And yet on the other hand I saw the cliff in the opposite direction. Where I remember I had fallen to the waves and fallen back to his company.

"Bella?"

The husky tone broke my meditation of the silky voice I was once accustomed to. "Yes?" I replied with a question, not knowing what he was thinking.

"I was just wondering if you remember all the times we had here, before..."

"Shhh," I stopped his sentence, it was just all coming back, the memories I mean, "don't remind me, I'm still trying to let go remember? Trying to let go with _you_ by my side. And you know I don't want to talk about the cliff-"

"Bella, I was talking about the first time we met here on the beach."

"Oh." It was all I can come up with.

He became quiet, just welcoming the comforting silence that surrounded us. When I was just enjoying the feeling he slyly asked, "Why do you want to skip today Bells?" of course, he said that with his famous cheeky yet amusing manner.

I copied his tone, just to tease him a bit, knowing that being with him has its effects. Anyone who's infected by him can be like Jacob in a way. "Well, cause I want to. And I get to do what ever I want, got that?" More likely, I said that in a childish sort of voice.

"Bella! I can't believe you just did that," Jacob exclaimed, "using my own labeled attitude against its creator? How dare _you_." I flashed him a grin.

"Jacob, do you ever wonder of 'what ifs'? For example, what if the water is red and the sky is bright pink? What if I wasn't a clumsy human? What if mythical creatures, like you exist? What if…" I ended, knowing that this subject would go on in a path I would not like.

"But Bella remember, 'what ifs' only makes you go to your past, making you regret. 'What ifs' is a statement that will make us wonder, and in my opinion, makes us wiser. But sometimes these kinds of questions will lead us to a new beginning, or an entirely sour end."

"But Jake, I just can't help but feel, whenever I just stare off to space that I could have done something at one moment in time, maybe fix a problem, or make someone happy. I just…"

The topic ended, as we both heard the crashing of the waves. To lighten up the mood, I went and ran towards the shore. Jacob was too distracted to notice me, jumped up when he realized I wasn't by his side anymore, but I was struggling to run without tripping in the waves.

Thank God I folded up my pants and left my flip flops inside his car, because I was suddenly running on the La Push's beach shoreline, with Jacob slowing down just for the fun of it. When I knew he was near me, I bent down, cupped as much water as I could and threw the fluid at him, laughing as waves splashed amongst us.

I expected that we would have a water fight, and we did; running and spattering, having fun, and being kids. This makes me have a nostalgic feeling, remembering the innocent and carefree bubble that surrounds a young, curious child.

What I didn't expect was him carrying me, more likely throwing me in his back, and laying me gently in the sand, besides my constant 'let me go!', laughter and fake hitting. But I know that my hits wouldn't hurt him.

I stared into his very deep dark brown eyes, a darker shade than mines, for he was towering above me. I should have been scared, but I wasn't. Jacob can be scary when he wants to, but this Jacob that was hovering above me, was the Jake I knew, loved and _trusted_.

He moved his head toward me, slowly leaning in. Who can help it, I started to lean to him too. And before I knew it, our lips met.

A warm feeling spread through me, despite the almost chilling weather, not to mention my cold wet toes! But it felt that Jacob was my escape through it all. The kiss started out soft and gentle, but gradually became a bit fierce.

Our lips danced, and pranced. Tongues collided and met.

But I can't help the feeling that in the back of my head, a part of me, deep, deep down, felt guilty, hurt, betrayed, and… I knew that this tiny part of me wasn't the only one suffering.

_**Alive for he is here**_

_**I kiss him**_

_**It's nothing like yours, my dear**_

_**I love him. **_

_**I hope you suffer too**_

_**I feel him**_

_**Silent broken promises, I will forget you**_

_**If I try, and if I want to… Maybe **_

_**I don't hate you.**_

_**Come back**_

**

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End of Chapter**

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**Author's Note: I think you all will like Chapter 5. That is the chapter where you are bound to.. I dont know. lol. **

**Now can you kindly make my day and submit a review?**

**Thank you!**


	6. Principal's Office

**DISCLAIMER: All of these characters that you familiarized are not mine, these are Stephenie Meyer's!**

**So Sorry! If I had been gone for a long time! I was busy with all the occassions and stuff like that! And now I'm balancing heavy loads of work from schoo! Well Anyways here's Chp 5! No songs for this chapter for now.

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****_Chapter 5: Principal's Office_

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**

**Bella POV**

I arrived with Jacob back at school, before the last hour, as I had promised. _So far so good_, I thought, really hoping that Jacob and I wouldn't get caught after a fun filled afternoon. But all things must come to an end eventually.

So we went to our respective classrooms, thinking that the teachers were oblivious to our act, I later found out I was caught red handed when the principal suddenly called the teacher and had asked for my company.

And so there I went, on my way to the principal's office, all eyes were on me when I left the classroom, and sudden whispers came as the door came to a soft _click_.

I opened the principal's door, and quietly went inside. I saw Jacob there with a phantom less expression on his face, but when he came and looked at me in the eye, he winked, and had his cheesy smile.

"I'm assuming both of you know why I called you into my office, correct?" Principal Price said.

"Yes."

"And I also assume that your parents will know this, because I shall call them?" he stated once more.

"Uh Huh," both Jacob and I replied together, when we did this, we looked at each other, smiling.

"Then, lets get started with your deten-," the principal was cut off suddenly, when the door opened and revealed a person, with a voice that has a sudden familiarity to me.

"Mr. Price? I'm Christopher Lance Clair, OH!" the new guy just noticed me and Jacob sitting.

I got a good glimpse of him from my point of view. It struck me, that he looked alot like Edward. although unlikehhim, he had black hair that gleamed brown whenever it touched the light. His eyes were the most prominent green I had ever seen, but nonetheless he reminded me of that certain someone.

Then he looked at me, with a feeling that I could not seem to place. We stared at each other for a good amount of time, trying to look through each other, to figure something deep within us, Edward was all I could think of. I blushed when he smiled at me.

Jacob tensed for he also saw the guy's complexion and look. I gave him a gentle squeeze in the hand so he would calm down, I wouldn't want him to transform in front of witnesses.

"Mr. Clair, I will deal with you later, for I have matters at hand."

"Yes Sir, of course."

When I heard him say that, I felt as if his voice got a little edgy but still really musical, then he left.

"Okay," the principal started, "since I know that you _will_ not do this ridiculous thing again, I will let you off, but you will serve a week of detention, for I know that your parents will discipline you when you get home."

Jacob and I kept our remorse and guilty look, when we went out of the office, we burst into laughter.

"Did… see… face!.. can't believe…" and that's all I heard from Jake.

We decided that today was not the right day to go back to class, so we just hung around the front of the office, but I can't help but go back to those green eyes. Jacob was oblivious to the fact that I was staring at the non-existent interesting thing on the floor, all I could do was nod and laugh at the part where he laughed at his story. I just really couldn't help but think about those intense green eyes, it's as if I had seen them before.

But no, I told myself that life is only to be with Jacob, and him only. But Edward, there's still something in me that kept on igniting the candlelight that he still is coming back. But I really doubt that, really, I'm sure of it.

The feeling of suspense came, on what Charlie would do to me when I got home. Grounded, a week off without Jake or maybe the childish silent treatment? Ugh. Why didn't my better judgment won against my courageous side.

My thoughts and Jacob's story was interrupted when the door opened and revealed the person I was just thinking about.

I didn't know how it happened, but all I remember is I was a little close to the door, _too_ close, and I suddenly ended up looking at the lights on the ceiling?

_Darn it_. I thought. I tried to gain my composure, and when I looked at my surroundings, I can see Jacob to the right, and the new kid on my left. And I didn't think they had noticed me, because I can still see them arguing.

"It's your damn fault she is unconscious!" screamed Jacob.

"And I apologized for it, I really didn't know that she was at the door," the new guy explained calmly.

"Guys," I squeaked, "I'm okay. Stop fighting."

"Bells!" I heard Jacob, while pulling me up from the floor.

"Are you okay," begin, what's his name, Clark? Claude? "I'm terribly sorry."

When I got up, and got a better view, I told the handsome guy that it's alright. And I reassured Jacob, that this is not serious, and that I'm really okay. Sheesh, talk about worried.

"Just next time watch out for me okay," I told the guy, "I can be really clumsy."

"I noticed."

"Well see you around," I added with a happy note "– Come on Jake lets go home, before Charlie gets really mad!"

I heard him mutter a goodbye, and another thing I couldn't place my head on. I rushed to the truck and headed my way back to my home, where a certain someone is bound to shout at me.

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**_End of Chapter 5_**

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**Let me know what you think! Review Please!**


	7. Slipping Through My Fingers

**Author's Note: Hey everyone! Ah the beauty of Spring Break, now I had the time to update. YAY! Well here you go, Chapter 6. I want to thank my awesome friend/editor Christina, for coming over my house and editing my work. I am hopeless without her pet peeve. hehe. Well Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: The lovely characters that you recognize are not mine they are Stephenie Meyer's, and also the song "Slipping Through my Fingers" by ABBA. **

**Chapter 6: Slipping Through My Fingers**

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**Bella's POV**

As soon as I got off my truck, I was instantly welcomed by a –

"ISABELLA MARIE SWAN! GET YOURSELF IN THIS HOUSE RIGHT NOW YOUNG LADY!" – well, you know what I mean.

**Charlie's POV**

_**Schoolbag in hand  
She leaves home in the early morning  
Waving goodbye  
With an absent-minded smile  
I watch her go  
With a surge of that well-known sadness  
And I have to sit down for a while  
The feeling that I'm loosing her forever  
And without really entering her world  
I'm glad whenever I can share her laughter  
That funny little girl**_

What has gotten into that girl?! Renee told me that she didn't really get into trouble like this, and how can she really skip school? I think its Jacob's fault, I mean who else right? Speaking of her, she's back.

"ISABELLA MARIE SWAN! GET YOURSELF IN THIS ROOM RIGHT NOW YOUNG LADY!". The excessive screaming strained my voice since I wasn't used to the whole "angry dad" thing.

I saw her enter, with a guilty and expected expression on her face. And once she sat down on the couch, I remained standing; the fire inside me still burning.

"Explain to me why the principal called me, while I was on duty? For a moment there, I thought he was calling in to tell me that you were hurt or something. But instead I get the news that you were skipping?!"

"Dad, it was only today, and it was just a free day, so it's no big deal."

"What do you mean by 'it's no big deal'!? You just broke the rules and policies of your school! You are a daughter of a chief police and we need to set an example for the community. I bet that it was Jacob's influence that lead you on to do this."

"Wait a minute, weren't you the one who told me 'Jacob's a good guy, he's better than…"

And there it was, the look that I had seen so many times before when she started to remember that Edward guy and when he left her. That distant stare which takes her to a different time and place. I thought I wouldn't have to see that look ever since Jacob came into her life, but it still happens every now and again.

"…well, you know."

"I still think that he is nice, but I just feel that you may be moving into a different direction."

"Whatever, don't bring Jacob into this. For you information, I was the one that told him to skip with me, not him!"

"Then why did you do such an IMMATURE act!?"

"I KNOW WHAT I WAS DOING OKAY!? CAN YOU JUST ACCEPT THAT!"

"DON'T USE THAT TONE WITH ME YOUNG LADY! YOU KNOW WHAT JUST…JUST…!" I didn't finish, I just pointed to her, and sighed, this isn't going to solve anything.

"I'm going to shop for groceries." I just nodded after she said that, I heard her truck rolling against the pathway, and out to the streets.

I plopped down into the couch, and brought hands on my temples, going over our very short conversation. Am I doing a good job as a father? What lead to this rebellion? Is that what it is, a rebellion, but against what or _who_?

_**Slipping through my fingers all the time  
I try to capture every minute  
The feeling in it  
Slipping through my fingers all the time  
Do I really see what's in her mind  
Each time I think I'm close to knowing  
She keeps on growing  
Slipping through my fingers all the time**_

Every single time she's away from me, I really don't know what she's doing. It's as if she is hiding something; something really valuable from me, and something so important in her life.

I heard the phone rang, so I went up, and put my thoughts aside.

"Hello? Charlie Swan speaking."

"Charlie! Hey, this is Billy!"

"Oh, how are yah Billy?"

"I'm good."

"That's nice to hear, and umm did you get a phone call from the principal?"

"Oh yeah, about that, let it go, they're just kids. Come on, we used to do that all the time!"

I was hesitant to answer, but I replied, "Yeah, sure."

"Well I was just calling to check on you. Do you want to come for dinner at my place. You can bring Bella along!"

I couldn't refuse, even though I was still wary that it was Jacob that caused Bella's act.

"Sure, why not."

After the phone call, I continued my pondering about Bella. Oh, my sweet Bella. She seems so new, so independent. But at the same time so vulnerable in many ways, especially when that Cullen kid left her, she was just not _there_; her body was present, but not her _inner self_. I'm thankful for Billy's son, for he was the only one who knew how to hold her up and make her what she is now. But there's something missing; I couldn't put my finger on it. No more was she the little girl that always had a stubborn, yet funny smile on her face whenever she visited me during the summer. No more was she the little girl that I could carry with ease. No more was she my little Bells.

_Renee, if we hadn't divorced, will our daughter be like this still?_ I asked myself. Would she have been happier, if we had stayed together?

_**Sleep in our eyes  
Her and me at the breakfast table  
Barely awake  
I let precious time go by  
Then when she's gone  
There's that odd melancholy feeling  
And a sense of guilt  
I can't deny  
What happened to the wonderful adventures  
The places I had planned for us to go  
Well some of that we did  
But most we didn't  
And why I just don't know**_

Its funny how before I was the one that needed to feed her. But now, she is the one that is taking care of me. If I were to lose Bells, I wouldn't know what to do anymore; two angels, Renee and Bella, would leave me.

I couldn't stand the overwhelming feeling the house was giving me. So I went out for a drive. Maybe I could drop by Billy's early. I left a note for Bella on the kitchen counter that said,

_Bella, I'm going to be at Billy's. Come over and we're gonna have dinner there. I'm sorry for the outburst. Love you. _

_Dad._

_**Slipping through my fingers all the time**_

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**_End of Chapter 6_**

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**Please Review! It really makes me happy and motivated when people let me know what they want, or think. Get ready for Chapter 7. I will really try to keep my updates really quick, but the content is great. Thank you!**


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